PLAYTIME: Wonder Woman: The Movie
The discussion about the Avengers film has started dredging up ideas about how to make Wonder Woman work on screen. Since some of y'all seem to think you have the answer... what is it? Focus on the Greek mythology? Her super powers? Action? Romance? Bondage? Humor? Remake/remodel-type sketches with explanatory text are welcome, but so are plain pitches and brainstorming of whatever length. Not that we're going to solve it for Warner Bros, but what if you had the chance?
Comments
I'd do a period flick. It's the 1940s, and Princess Diana of Themyscara has come to our shores to beat the living dogshit out of miscreants in the interests of peace. When this starts causing, y'know, massive hospitalization and property damage, FDR tasks Steve Trevor to point her at the Nazis.
Steve, with a newfound appreciation of life on account of surviving a plane crash and hanging out with the most beautiful woman in the world, is torn between following orders and being sick of fighting/danger/etc. Diana has to stop a Nazi plot while also learning that punching can't solve everything.
Big themes of the film include "when to fight, when to not", something something commentary on Army Husbands something something, and watching an attractive Greek woman suplex tanks.
To be honest, I have no interest in Wonder Woman unless it's starring a young Linda Carter.
I've never actually seen the original show, but I heard that was the case, yeah.
(I'd actually do movie 1 in the 40s, movie 2 in the 60s (white-costumed Diana-as-spy being a way for her to try and reign in her wild brawling from the 40s while still doing good) movie 3 in modern day (the Wondy-as-ambassador-CEO, trying to figure out if she's gone "soft" or just grown up.)
But then, I'm not going to second guess what they should or should not do to have a successful movie, comic etc. I'm just going to fantasize what I would do, given my druthers, and the fans be-damned.
As I said elsewhere, the title would be Wonder Woman, but she would never answer to that name. Why would anybody? Diana, of course, isn't Greek, its Roman and my model for Diana would be Artemis, the virgin hunter sister to Apollo. Like Artemis, Diana would be a hunter-- lean, athletic and taut as a bowstring. Among film stars, Camille Paglia described Katherine Hepburn as the perfect Artemis; boyish and cocksure. She probably should be blonde. Apollo and Artemis's origins seem to have been to the north of Greece; they were immigrants. The Amazons were described as being up around the Black Sea, so blonde would work....
...however, Diana isn't Artemis, just modeled on her, so for me, a fine contemporary actress to play the role might be Zoe Saldana. I do think that one of the keys to a successful movie superhero is casting the right actor. Iron Man is more successful than Thor and Cap because RDJ is more appealing than Hemsworth and Evans. Hard to know what will work though, Bana and Norton are fine actors and Hulk didn't smash much.
So anyway, my Diana would be here on a hunt. Since I want a fantasy element she would be here ferreting out and destroying mythological beasties who are here in disguise doing more or less nasty things. Think American Gods.
She doesn't fly, but she's fast, strong and exceptionally well coordinated and trained. I'll let her have the magic lasso, and some other weapons as well-- bow, spear, sword and a small shield, each with some special property. I'd dump the WW and go back to the eagle. I'm surprising nobody when I point out that eagles are ancient symbols of authority. Outfits are red, blue and gold, and yes, she has more than one, for different occasions, but they are identifiable by theme, and she often dresses in mufti.
She would be smart and sexy and rebuff attempts to seduce her. And at some point, I'd have a small scene where she helps a young mother as a tip of the cap to Artemis's role as goddess of child birth.
*I'm working on a script that takes a character from a couple millennia ago, and tries to set the story in the present, so I assure you: I'm not opposed to the idea in principle.
think it'd sell, or because I think other people would be into it. Just
because that's the thing that most interests me about her, the
ramifications of her origin and her character.)
That's my approach to this exercise. Don't worry about second guessing "what will work", just focus on what you would want to do with the character to please yourself. Probably more likely to come up with something that does work
So what's Wonder Woman's journey? What does she have to overcome? She's a pampered princess from an isolated, utopian kingdom. She grew up with validation, empowerment, and sisterhood as a way of life. Then she comes out into our world, where those qualities are in short supply. She's here to "save us", but is this violent, corrupt, deeply sexist horrorshow of a society even worth saving? Were the lofty ideals she was taught really just so much fairy dust? That's her real struggle, over and above whatever evil gods and supervillains she has to beat up: Putting her faith through the crucible, and separating out the platitudes and dogma from the things that she truly holds sacred.
The climactic scene: The bad guy has thrown everything he has at Wonder Woman, and she has survived it all, bloody but unbowed. He couldn't intimidate her, he couldn't corrupt her, and he couldn't kill her. Seething with rage, he demands to know, "Why? Why do you risk everything for these sheep?"
WW: "Because I love them. Every one of them. I see them struggle and sweat and bleed every day of their lives, and they inspire me. I love them even when they're small and scared and beaten down, because I've seen what they're capable of when they stand up. I love them for what they are and what they can become. I fight you because I love them, and they deserve better than to kneel before a tyrant."
And then she kisses the bad guy on the forehead. "And I fight you because I love you and you deserve better, too."
Somebody in the US thought it would be a good idea to take up diplomatic relations, and the amazons, being all peaceful and empowering and into cooperation, play along and send Diana who then finds out it's all a plot to get Themyscira to join some International trade or military union under US leadership, pretty much a takeover. Pissed off, she goes rogue and leaves her liaison Steve Trevor behind to look for her or else he'll get hell from his superiors.
So now Diana's out in the streets of whatever city is her haunt in the comics and meets some actual Americans who turn out to be not at all like what the diplomats have pretended (they did put on a bit of a show for her). It's both better and worse than she imagined. In the meantime, the villain who's one of the diplomats but totally has her own agenda cons the US government into a hostile takeover of Themyscira. Diana and Steve team up against the effort, but since she can't just go kill the US army 'cause that would be wrong (maybe something she only just learned from Steve? which would mean it's as much about protecting her home as it is about protecting those poor soldiers 'cause the amazons, once unleashed, wouldn't hold back much. (Heck, they hardly even heard of Geneva.)
The conflict results in Themyscira mystically sealing itself off from the outside world, but Diana decides to stay because she got interested in those weird Americans. Or maybe she's exiled because she got too Americanized.
Yeah, I know it'd never be made 'cause the US are the bad guys. Which is why I introduced the villain with his secret agenda.
Anyway, that or Themyscira has been aware of the outside world all along, having sent out spies for a long time but always staying not involved and secluded because they aways decided we weren't ready yet for them to meddle with us, being all flawed and war-hungry and down on social security and stuff. Until a certain rebellious princess decides maybe they shoukd just teach us all that good stuff and leaves for America because it's the most influential of the in-world countries (according to it). Of course, the plan fails miserably, nobody wants to learn what she has to teach, and she actually creates trouble for her home because for the first time ever, a nation becomes aware of Themyscira. Enter the villain who decides they're a danger for the American way and drives the UN into a war effort. The rest is pretty much like my first pitch, with some angsty guilt on Diana's side added into the mix.
And I agree that nobody calls her Wonder Woman; that's just a media nickname.